Hi. I decided to take a break for two weeks because I’ve been really busy with my college. I mean, I’m not studying for my upcoming exams but I did lose my registration certificate so I had to run around a lot in order to get a duplicate one, it’s a long process. Lately I’ve also been feeling kind of lazy and irritated. But that has nothing to do with this post. Reading the title of this post, I guess you understand what today’s rant is going to be about. I can’t help it, I love sharing stories that are personal to me because I believe when you’re coming from a place of emotion vulnerability, there are people who can relate.
Attention is something that everyone loves. If not everyone then, most people anyway do and I don’t blame them. Who wouldn’t want to be appreciated for their work, right ? I am used to getting a lot of attention, be it in real life or social media especially Instagram. I got a lot of negative attention when I was in school, I was famous for all the wrong reasons but in high school I tried to change and I was successful but did my bullies stop coming for me ? No. I had people talk about me everywhere and in the beginning I liked it because I didn’t have any meaningful connections or friends that I could have real conversations with so that was kind of the replacement for me.
Now, in the final year of high school I actually had friends and for the first time I felt like I had people I could open up to. I didn’t actually open up and talk about everything I was going through back then but I did pay attention to what they were saying and somehow that was everything. I was happier. I learned that if you pay attention, you’re happy and the more you crave for attention, you’re bound to be unhappy.
I receive enormous Instagram messages everyday and in the beginning I replied to every single one of them, I interacted with strangers who were kind enough to leave positive comments on my posts and I even called out haters. But over the years it felt really unhealthy. This contributed to my obsession with social media.
A year back I decided to restart blogging and this time I had a different mindset. I didn’t care how many people read my posts, I just posted and share those links to my Instagram Stories and my Twitter and I would say it has worked out just fine. I create art because I like being able to focus on only one thing and this has been a great exercise for my brain. I’m a better listener, I’m learning new things everyday and I love being a part of the blogging community.
I recently broke off ties with a toxic friend who got inspired by me and started blogging and he created a separate account on every single social media platform for his blog. He posted about it everywhere but it didn’t work out for him. He made posts asking his readers to follow him so that he’d have 100 followers in just a month. He tried everything but nothing worked. I tried to tell him that even if he decided to stay anonymous and not reveal his real identity on his blog, he was still striving to be famous. What if we created art without any hope of getting attention ? I love when people tell me how much they’re INSPIRED by my words and I love when someone decides to open up to me and feel close enough to share their Stories. I didn’t ask for it directly, but I got it. I think it’s not just about us bloggers, any person in the creative world should have a different mindset than what most do these days. Actors need to pay attention to their characters and not on what the critiques might comment on them later. Writers should not worry about how their pieces are going to be reviewed. Singers shouldn’t worry about what the world thinks of their voice. There is always one person who’s going to like you. I feel privileged enough that I have many of you who decide to read my blog and understand the reason why I haven’t posted on Instagram for so long and why I decide to take breaks unannounced. I hope you will think about what I said and do what you want only because you think it’s going to bring you joy. Pay attention to your work. Don’t do it because you want appreciation. Do it because it makes you creative and expresses what you feel.
Until next time,
Milly
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