On Happiness

Thousands of candles can be lighted from a single candle, and the life of the candle will not be shortened. Happiness never decreases by being shared. — Buddha

We live in a society where innumerable amount of pressure is put on us. That is a topic of discussion for another day but of all those pressures one’s that of being happy. Society tells us that we have to be happy all the time. If you really think about it, it’s a toxic thing. I mean sure, Be Happy but basing your life on one single emotion sounds really boring. Is happiness even an emotion ? Is it a state of mind ? Is it a feeling that you’re supposed to feel just out of nowhere ?
Let’s say it is an emotion just like everything else we feel – sadness, anger,. These are the six core emotions known to any living being. ( You can learn about them in a fun way from the movie “Inside Out”)
Everything in this universe is connected. You cannot feel happiness if you haven’t felt any other emotion. They all serve their own purposes. Being happy all the time sounds really unfair. How can you even think about it ? There’s so much going on in this world around us. We are just a small part of it and as harsh as it sounds, it is the reality – THE WORLD DOESN’T REVOLVE AROUND YOU. These days people think that not caring about something will set them apart from the crowd or make them “cool”. It doesn’t. Kindness is beautiful. Kindness is underrated. Caring is underrated. As a natural empath, I tend to care more. I don’t think I’ve ever really known what happiness is which is why I have a hard time describing it. Sure, I’ve felt joy several times. But that didn’t last. “Retail therapy” doesn’t work for me. Nothing materialistic works for me. Money is important. Money is a necessity. Money does not guarantee “happiness”.
Happiness is overrated and not a realistic goal to set for yourself. How can you even tell that the thing you want to do is going to provide you with happiness.
Let’s get a little uncomfortable and talk about “depression”. It’s a big thing, not to be taken lightly but most people do take it lightly. They confuse sadness with depression. They post “quotes” on social media about depression when in reality they are leading the lives probably thousands would kill for. It’s so selfish. It’s very important to overlook small hurts and concentrate on the bigger picture. I’m not saying it’s a competition, it is definitely not. Go to a therapist or talk to someone you like, seek help if you think it’s serious. I just think that people label themselves “depressed” when in reality they don’t even know what’s it like. It’s not that glamorous as you see in 13 Reasons Why. It’s so much more than that. Depression is not a brand that you can be an ambassador of. No one has a monopoly on pain. Now, if you’ve been diagnosed with depression, I want you to know that you’re not crazy. You just have unmet needs, be it psychological or physiological ( Maslow’s Hierarchy Of Needs ).

There is no straight definition of the word “Happiness”. What even is happiness ? How long does it even last ? Should we strive to HAVE IT ALL ? CAN we have it all ?
Who knows.
Does it mean you should get rid of your desires to finally put an end to the suffering ? Definitely not. Strive to achieve your goals. Try harder. It’s okay to give up too but only do that if you know you won’t have regrets later on. There’s no certain way of knowing that though. The unknown is scary, but it doesn’t have to be. The unknown is not known to you yet, it could be everything you wanted. You can make it everything you wanted. Just Live every moment while you can.

“Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away.”.

Until next time,
Milly x